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This Too Shall Pass

Yesterday was painful. While it was a beautiful summer day outside and I had a light week of work on the horizon, I still felt a wave of depression overcoming me. This showed up in feelings of emptiness and lack of fulfillment throughout my day. Even my usual morning routine of sitting out in the sun with some coffee and meditation didn’t do it for me. 

My anxiety started to run wild. I searched for meaning in what this was. Was it not having enough down time this weekend? Was it the bickering with my husband? What about the fact that it was a cloudy weekend and I didn’t get much vitamin D? Am I not doing as well as I thought? How long will this last? 

I wanted answers.

I had a very similar experience with a client exactly a week prior who sat in my office, very tearful, after just having a tough weekend. Her emotions in that moment made her feel as if all the work she had done in therapy over the past year had failed. She started to look for answers.  Wondering what changes she could make in her life, such as leaving her job or moving across the country to live in isolation. These are not light choices to be making. 

Yesterday, she was feeling better. As she spoke, I was reminded of what I preach on a regular basis: Emotions are temporary. When we feel deeply and intensely, sometimes it is just one of those days. This is not a reflection of how hard we’ve worked on healing. It is a normal human experience to simply not have a great day. You may not know why, and that’s okay. 

In fact, a lot of the time, it is in our best interest not to put meaning into each and every feeling that comes over us. This results in story-telling: creating a narrative that may not even exist in reality. This made up story based on transient emotion makes us feel scared, discouraged, hopeless, and overwhelmed. But if we can hold on to the fact that the feeling will pass—should we allow it—we can start with a blank canvas tomorrow. No pressure to fix something that’s not broken. 

I often find that we are waiting for the day when we cross the finish line into happiness. Despite the fact that life simply doesn’t operate that way. There’s no end goal. It’s an ever-evolving, fluid experience and each day is unpredictable. We can’t run away from the hard days, even if we did absolutely everything right in life. But the beauty of all of this is that happiness and contentment aren’t far away. It doesn’t need to be years from now when you finally get everything you want. It can be tomorrow when you stop to notice the sun on your face. 

As my mother always said, “This too shall pass”. Yesterday was difficult, but today is a new day.